You have been told many times to avoid negative people. It has been said that you become like the people you hang around. These are my 5. I avoid hanging around such people for fear of becoming like them. It is not easy. Sometime I catch myself too late and already their effects are already showing in my own life, attitudes and habits. Thankfully the stains can be washed off. We all know these people, we all have them in our phonebooks. I have some of these people saved in my phonebook with their last name as “Don’t pick”. I use Mr in their title very loosely in that they hardly deserve that salutation and also in a universal sense i.e. they could also be Miss, Mrs, or Ms.
1. Mr. That-will-never-work
This guy may probably be the worst of the lot. Take any idea to this person and after your presentation, they are ready with 53 reasons why it will never work. They will give you examples of others who tried similar things in the past and failed miserably. They are perpetually frowning. In fact as they grow older the frown becomes a permanent sneer. He is a permanently wet blanket. They will even surprise you with their pessimism. They seem to have a fascination with disasters since most of the time they prove their point. According to a close friend of mine, you will never find these people in places where solutions are being discussed, sought or even mentioned. They take “mourn with those who mourn” to a whole new level.
Understandably many of these folks will be in bad relationships since by definition they are predisposed to be in them. But they have a perfect explanation why things are not working well and usually it is not their fault. What these people have in common is an ungrateful spirit. If this person was to win a car in the “Vroomisha na Ketepa” promotion, they would probably complain that they won a white car yet they really wanted a blue one.
2. Mr. Judgmental
Despite being sometimes very deeply spiritual, this one is a complete Pharisee. If you read through the new testament, these people were obsessed with looking good from a moral standpoint. They did this primarily by making others around them look worse. Check out Luke 18:9-14. They were showy in their acts of worship like prayer and giving. They would wash the outside of a cup but not the inside. Jesus once referred to them as whitewashed tombs. Strong words. These are the worst people to go to when you have a confession go make. Usually they are secretly guilty of the same thing they accuse others of if not worse. Holier than thou has nothing on these folks.
They can be summarised by a Facebook status I saw this week
‘the Kenyan pastor was so shocked to see a Ugandan pastor drinking beer that he swallowed his cigarette!’
3. Mr. I-have-it-all-and-you-don’t
We all know one such person. This is the kind of person who will invite you to their place not because they like you but because they have acquired something that you just have to see. Usually when you arrive you find you are one of forty guests. By the time you get there people have already been taken on a tour around the palatial home and have been shown the new gadget, gizmo, vehicle, achievement, acquisition and are now feasting on a sumptuous meal after which the emcee will give many an opportunity to heap praises upon this person. More often than not this person will be a politician or harbours political ambitions. It is easy to think that this kind of person will only be found in posh places like Runda, Karen, Muthaiga and such, but they can be found everywhere from Kawangware, Mukuru Kwa Njenga and Buru, South B/C as well. It does not matter where you are, after a while, one or two such people will crop up.
It should not be assumed that all rich people fall in this category, not at all. I know many pleasant rich people and I also know many unbearable poor people. What separates these people is their attitude.
4. Mr. Know-it-all
These are everywhere too. But you are more likely to notice them in places of work. They spend a lot of time reading things with the sole purpose of showing off. A lot of the stuff they spew out is not original and is usually a result of copy/paste ‘research’. Sadly, a large number of bloggers are in this category. A lot of these people owe their very being to Google. After spending an hour with such a person if you can manage that, you really wonder what you did in school. I don’t know what is worse than being such a person and also harbouring political ambition. On Facebook and twitter they sometimes can be ‘grammar-queens’ very quick to tell you that it is ‘I’m’ and not ‘Am’, ‘for whom’ not ‘for who’.
Again, it should not be assumed that all people who know a lot of stuff are in this category. Again, the difference is in the attitude. I have several friends who know a lot of stuff. These are people with whom I can spend hours just savouring their wisdom and learning at their feet. There is something very attractive about humility combined with wisdom.
5. Mr. Nisaidie, aka Mr. Naomba-Serikali
Of the lot, this one is most likely to be a family member, one of the people you go to church with or a member of your small church home group. He is a perpetual victim. He would be so far in life if only this or that did not happen. He will only call on you when things are bad. When things are ok he is nowhere to be found. He will borrow money from you when things are bad and never pay you back. Usually he is unemployed but if not he can hardly keep a job. He will resign in protest, seconds before he is fired citing unfair working conditions. This person can live on handouts for a long time. They always have drama in their life since they are hardly in control. This guy is perpetually guilting those around him to help him deal with what he does not seem to realize are the consequences of his bad choices. Taking responsibility for their actions is out of the question. Life happens to them.
Who are your notorious five? People you avoid and also avoid being?